Whippet Poem

Why own a whippet? There’s a danger you know
you can’t own just one, for the craving will grow
There’s no doubt they’re addictive, wherein lies the danger
While living with lots, you’ll grow poorer and stranger
One dog is no trouble and two are so funny
The third one is easy, the fourth one’s a honey
The fifth is delightful, the sixth one’s a breeze
You find you can live with a houseful, with ease
So how ’bout another? Would you really dare?
They’re really quite easy, but, Oh Lord, more hair!
With dogs on the sofa and dogs on the bed
and crates in the kitchen, it’s no bother, you’ve said
They’re really no trouble, their manners are great
What’s just one more dog and one more crate?
The sofa is hairy, the windows are crusty
The floor is all footprints, the furniture’s dusty
The housekeeping suffers, but what do you care?
Who minds a few nose prints and a little more hair?
So let’s get that puppy, you can always find room
And a little more time for the dust cloth and broom
There’s hardly a limit to the dogs you can add
The thought of a cutback sure makes you feel bad
Each whippet is so special, so sweet, so funny
The food bill grows larger, you owe the vet money
Your kids never visit, few friends come to stay
Except other dog folk who live the same way
Your lawn has now died, and your shrubs are dead too
But your weekends are busy, ’cause you’re off with your crew
There’s dog food and vitamins, training and shots
And entries and travel and motels which cost lots
Is it worth it you wonder? Are you caught in a trap?
Then that puppy comes up and climbs into your lap
Her look says you’re special and you know that you will
keep all the critters, in spite of the bill
Some just for show and some just to race
some just for loving, they all fill a need, they all have a place
But winter’s a hassle, the whippets hate it too
But they must have their walks, though they’re numb and you’re blue
Late evening is awful, you scream and you shout
at the dogs on the sofa, who refuse to go out
The dogs and the competition, the travel, the thrills
The work and the worry, the pressure and the bills
The whole thing seems worth it, the dogs are your life
They’re charming and funny and offset the strife
Your lifestyle has changed. Things just won’t be the same
Yes, those dogs are addictive and so’s the dog game

Author – ANON

December 6th, 2006